Trying to heal an injured man: bad idea

I’m not going to tell you that dating an injured man or woman is a bad idea. The truth is that only you have control over it. We all have baggage in this life, we have all been hurt, and we all heal in our own space and time. It is one thing to have a relationship with a wounded man and quite another to be Mother Teresa and heal a wounded man.

It is NOT your job to heal a wounded man

We have a serious problem in love relationships today. We want to control even the healing process of our loved ones. All this in vain since neither you, nor the reading of letters, nor anything is going to make the boy you are with suddenly heal. Accompanying is not the same as trying to make it happen. Injured men tend to build a shell much thicker than a woman’s. They were taught to be tough, not to talk about their emotions, etc … You can try to knock down the shell of an injured man, but only he will decide when he lets you pass. To all this, it is not your job to make your boyfriend or your partner heal. Healing is a very personal process.

Some boys decide not to heal

They spend years wondering why the ex left him or in the end, decided to go in another direction. Your healing process can take years and years. They do not want to fall into the same trap, of course that does not make them hermits. Some of them tend to have short and insignificant relationships. They get excited about the wrong girls and end up wanting this life of “freedom.” It is not something that you have to fix, because if you are in your right mind, you know very well that in any relationship there is freedom, in fact that is the most important thing.

Far from helping him, you are likely to get hurt

Please do not try to be anyone’s savior, if you are doing it, the one who has to save likely is yourself. You really want to get into that tug of war, which wouldn’t be better than dating a hurt guy you just flow without trying to get him to open up to you. Or simply look for someone who is available to have a good relationship, a healthier one.

You don’t have to carry anyone’s sorrows

That is perhaps the most important thing in this conversation. It is not your responsibility to bear their grief or pain. In fact, if you do, it is likely that as time passes, he will move away from you. Because no one likes their battles to be fought, we all have a responsibility to move forward on our own. Couples are there to accompany each other, not to bear each other’s sorrows. In short, do not fight others’ battles.

By TVOC Editor

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Related Posts